The worst and best year of my life

So today I’m trying to psych myself out to work on the next year in my story. 1995 was definitely the worst AND best year of my life. It was a year of major transitions. I’ve always said I feel like I went through two divorces that year. When you read the story, you’ll understand what I mean by that. I think what I may have to do is split the story of 1995 into two sections, the bad and the good. It was bad up to about September/October and good for October through December with a little overlap in the middle of it all.
Reliving my past has been difficult, but it has set me free as well. I finally feel detached from that part of my life. Once I get past 1995, the story should flow. Of course I had good and bad times since ’95, but my life was basically stable after that point. Although I was 25 years old in 1995, I see that year as the turning point from childhood to adulthood. I sometimes think I was in some sort of limbo from the ages of 16-25. I was on my own, married with children, but I had no clue what that meant for me. I was merely sleepwalking through my life and now it all seems like a very bad dream. For years after my divorce, I felt like I was in a beautiful dream that I would awake from at any moment. I had nightmares for several years reliving my old life. I would have to pinch myself regularly to make sure my waking life was real. I still feel that happiness in my life everyday, but now it’s more real to me and the nightmares are much less frequent. I still haven’t come to a point of forgiving the people who have done me wrong in the past. Actually, I shouldn’t say that, I have forgiven some of them, including myself.

So, anyway, I apologize for taking so long to get this story out. I thought when I began that it would be easy, boy was I way off!

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